BATTLE OF THE DAMNED (2013)

Directed by Christopher Hatton, Starring: Dolph Lundgren, Matt Doran, David Field, Horror / Science-fiction, USA / Singapore 2013, 88mins, cert 15.

Lundgren and robots and zombies, oh my!

In Southeast Asia (where unscrupulous biotech research is apparently allowed without question), a contagious pathogen is inadvertently unleashed from a research facility. The effect of which is to turn (seemingly) the entire population of Southeast Asia into zombie-like infected extras. The area is quarantined by the military with no one allowed in or out. Enter stage left Major Max Gatling (Lundgren), who is hired to break in to the contaminated zone and rescue Jude, the daughter of the president of the biotech corporation. Before you can say ‘Snake Plissken’, Dolph and his small band of elite soldiers are up to their necks in suitably clunky B movie dialogue and shaky-cam zombie-slaughter.

I have a confession to make. Before I watched BATTLE OF THE DAMNED I had never seen a single film that Dolph Lundgren had appeared in. (I know, unforgivable). Well, as far as introductions go, this is serviceably entertaining with Mr Lundgren providing good value as the artery slicing, bone-crunching dispatcher of the bio-infected hoards. I particularly liked the fact he dons a pair of spectacles for map-reading (a nice nod to this action-man’s vintage). He does lumber somewhat in the running scenes, but outdoes himself when fending off a bunch of gut-munchers whilst being handcuffed to a lamppost. He also delivers a nice selection of deadpan one-liners such as: “Zombies everywhere you look and you’re scared of dirty diapers” being one of my favourites.

Having found the daughter Jude (Melanie Zanetti) and her ragtag group of survivors led by the untrustworthy Duke (David Field) – not forgetting the implausibly named martial arts ‘warrior’ Elvis – their chances of escape seem slim until a bunch of leaderless robots turn up. Huzzah! Instantly recognising the alpha-male, they happily comply with Gatling’s orders (clearly responding to Lundgren’s equally robotic-like acting) and after a few acetylene torch modifications (spikes and machine-guns), it’s human and robot marching as one against the damned.

The inclusion of robots (who don’t actually take centre-stage until 50 minutes into the films running time) injects a shot of welcome (if random) adrenaline into the narrative which at that point appears to be in danger of running out of steam much like Dolph’s jogging.  But apart from the monotonous and seemingly endless waves of infected citizens which our intrepid band of human and mecha continue to face, the film certainly doesn’t outstay its welcome and overall provides an entertainingly cheesy 80+ minutes.

*** (out of 5*)

Paul Worts